Drunken Lullabies

Let me just say, St. Patty's day almost defeated me. Saturday night was such a random ass night. It started just my friend and I casually drinking rum while watching Horrible Bosses. Went through about 3 or 4 drinks each by the time the movie was over. Of course the only logical thing to do after that would be to watch porn. And not normal porn, Spiderman, Batman, and Aladdin porn. Oh yeah. After getting a good laugh at that, I'm pretty sure we went outside for a cigarette. Where we ran into one other girl who was actually back from break who we never really talk to. So of course we invite her to drink with us! Which actually was a good idea because she's really chill. After she left is where things start getting a little fuzzy. I have this silly little habit where when I'm drunk I think it's a good idea to talk to people I don't know. I'm just friendly like that. Anyway, we're sitting outside on the back steps of his dorm when I see these two guys walking by looking up at us. So I start making conversation. Basically they were looking for people to drink with so I told them good luck and I'd probably see them later. Then we went back in and drank more. The next thing I remember is being back out on the steps with those two guys again. Whatever happened in between that God only knows. Then we all go back inside to drink more (because that was such a good idea at the time!) and things pretty much fade out after that. The next morning I wake up and think I'm alone until I feel someone's hand on my back. I thought it was my friends but nope. Just the random Russian guy I met. And now he won't stop texting me. Luckily nothing happened between us but why do I always attract the weirdos? His friend was the one I was interested in but noooooooooooo. I swear, drunk me just hates me. I also broke a hook off my bra, and broke the blinds on my friends window. And I think I'm still hungover. Coke just tastes like rum still. Damn you Captain Morgan. Damn you to the pits of hell.