Words I Never Said

I don't know what I want to say. I don't even know what's going on inside this weird little mind of mine right now. I've got a whiteboard full of shit to do that I just can't seem to get a start on yet because I keep drifting off. Off to past weekends, past months, past lives it feels like. Things change so quickly. What is going on today is going to be completely different from what goes on next week. The weirdest part though is that no one ever seems to notice. You just suddenly look back one day and you're like "holy shit. When did everything become so different?" I guess that's why I try so hard to hold on to everything. I mean I love change because it keeps life from becoming mundane and boring, but at the same time I hate it when things change between people. Not just romantic feelings but just any relationship between people. When I feel myself drifting apart from someone I tend to scramble to fix things even if I know it's never going to be the same. I hold on to the past like a life raft. Which makes things a little awkward for me when drunk me is going around ruining things. Just this past weekend, drunk me got in a fight with a good friend of mine. I have no idea what was said, but I know I made a total ass out of myself. And now the relationship between us is a little weird. Things like that make me want to build a time machine. I guess you just have to live every moment the best you can without worrying about what happens tomorrow. Take nothing for granted and enjoy everything. Or some lame shit like that.