Sad

There's something beautiful about being sad. Not depressed, not suicidal or upset. Just sad. Just looking around at everything and feeling that it's slipping away from you. Even when you know it's really not. I guess the possibility that it could. Maybe that's why everyone always says to appreciate what you have while you have it. Because it really won't be there long. You can die. You will die. It could be tomorrow. But the thing is, why should death frighten us? Once we're gone, we're gone. Regardless of what you believe in. It's continued life that frightens me to be honest. I don't know what I'll do once everything is gone. Sometimes I think about it. And I can never come up with anything. Just the thought that all of the people I know around me are going to be gone one day....it's terrifying. Because you get so used to the routine of them in your life. You know their roles. They're always there for a reason. Then one day, they just won't be. They won't be anything. I think that's what makes sad so beautiful. It's realizing what you're going to lose. Maybe not quite accepting it yet, because it is a hard thing to wrap your mind around, but realizing it. And then appreciating every single second. Even the really shitty ones. Because I think they'll matter too. It's just such a strange thing. Sad.